Clean Up Your Sales — DeWese

YOU ONLY get it here folks. “It” is the inside stuff on selling printing.

“It” is the revelation of facts about some dumb owners who park their Porsches out front, nap during a short workday in huge offices, and chase the gals in Accounting and the Bindery.

“It” is the assemblage and explanation of the secrets that lead to success in print sales. “It” is the destruction of the myths about the printing industry. If you’re reading this, you are so lucky! Every month, BAM, BAM, BAM! I try to make your life better. “BAM?” Can Emeril sue me for using “BAM?”

Here comes some of my wisdom right now. In an article titled, “Do Pretty People Earn More?” Kate Lorenz, CareerBuilder.com editor, writes, “People deemed to be good looking are often paid 3 to 8 percent more than average, while plainer people often earn 5 to 10 percent less. That’s a potential 18 point swing in salary.”

Ms. Lorenz goes on to write, “Studies show attractive students get more attention and higher evaluations from their teachers, good-looking patients get more personalized care from their doctors, and handsome criminals receive lighter sentences than less attractive convicts. But how much do looks matter at work?”

She adds, “The ugly truth, according to economics professors Daniel Hamermesh of the University of Texas and Jeff Biddle of Michigan State University, is that plain people earn 5 to 10 percent less than people of average looks who, in turn, earn 3 to 8 percent less than those deemed good looking.”

Whew! It’s a good thing that I’m not on salary working for a big company. Doctors have never liked me and tend to get abusive about my weight. I have never been a criminal, but the security people at Disney World x-ray me until I glow and I once got an $85 parking ticket. My teachers never liked me and, from kindergarten all the way through my Master’s degree, I had to clean the erasers and bring the teachers lunch.

Lorenz, of course, is writing about salaried employees in all industries versus commissioned print salespeople. She did not consult me on my research comparing appearance to the annual incomes of print salespeople.

My research conclusions are the reverse of salaried, pretty people because print salespeople are compensated on performance; that is to say, they are paid based on the profitable sales that they generate for their companies.

In fact, the top 20 print sales-people I know earned nearly $10 million last year. They sold more than $210 million in 2005.

Marvelle Stump (America’s worst print salesperson down in Hot Coffee, MS) is trying to cipher those statistics with his fingers, and his brain is beginning to hurt.

I better give him the answer.

Marvelle, that’s an average of more than $500,000.

It’s also about $425,000 more than the pay earned by the pretty people Ms. Lorenz writes about.

A few of my 20 salespeople have lean builds and might be considered semi-pretty. The group on average, however, is, well, er, “chubby.”

They are about 37 percent overweight. My team also averages 5’3½˝ in height. They’re an equal amalgamation of 10 women and 10 men. The women average 5’1˝ and the men average 5’8˝. So, basically, they are short and round.

Most of them are near-sighted and wear thick glasses. On the other hand, they are graciously charitable and modest about their thick wallets. They don’t flaunt their big pay checks. It reminds me of an article by Dominic Dunne, the famous writer for Vanity Fair. In writing about a wealthy Long Island couple, he recounted how someone remarked to the wife, “Your husband is very short.” And she replied, “But he’s very tall when he stands on his wallet.”

I’m probably gonna get hate mail from all the tall, skinny, pretty people. So I better change the subject real quick.

I really don’t care if you are short and chubby or tall and beautiful. But I do care about your sales grooming. Extraordinary, exotic adornment or unusual attire can be a distraction to the sales relationship, so why risk it?

I’m talkin’ about multiple piercings, multiple and observable tattoos, poorly fitted hair pieces or badly colored hair. Garish or excessive jewelry is also bad.

Excess or poorly applied makeup is bad, especially if you get your blush on your moustache. Nose hair and ear hair, need I say more, are real bad. Tight fitting clothing is inappropriate on sales calls, and save the cleavage or, here’s a new word, “decollette” should be reserved for the evening at social events. Guys, it is not appropriate to ever show your cleavage. Excess or unusual facial hair can be risky.

We have evolved into a casually dressed society. Make certain your casual business attire is well-fitted and ample. It must be clean, pressed and professional. When in doubt wear a suit and tie if you still have them. Wear the most expensive (the finest) clothing you can afford. No one wants to buy printing from an unsuccessful salesperson. I won’t bore you with hackneyed remarks about shined shoes but, dammit, do it.

Frequent bathing and the application of proven and successful deodorant are essential. The care and cleanliness of your finger nails is enormously important. Men and women should have manicured nails and I personally eschew any clear polish for the men. I know one 30-year-old who bites his nails and consequently they look atrocious. Consider the statement he is making whenever he gestures and exposes those abominations to clients.

Those of you who know me know that I’m 5’7˝ and 240 pounds. That is short and round. I have never had a client who felt threatened by my beauty. On the other hand, I’m clean shaven, deodorized and I’m wearing shined Ferragamos and Trafalgar suspenders to keep my britches from falling down. Likewise, I have never met a banker who would allow me to deposit individuality or accept free-thinking appearance as collateral for a loan.

I have written this for those of you who work with folks who need to fix their appearance. Simply copy the column. Erase your fingerprints. Come in at 7 am and place the photocopy on their desk. This is especially important for pretty, but poorly groomed, people. Now, go floss, brush your teeth, swish some mouthwash, and then get out there and sell something!

—HARRIS DEWESE

About the Author
Harris DeWese is the author of Now Get Out There and Sell Something, available through NAPL or PIA/GATF. He is chairman and CEO at Compass Capital Partners and is an author of the annual “Compass Report,” the definitive source of information regarding printing industry M&A activity. DeWese has completed more than 100 printing company transactions and is viewed as the preeminent deal maker in the printing industry. He specializes in investment banking, mergers and acquisitions, sales, marketing, planning and management services to printing companies. He can be reached via e-mail at DeWeseH@ComCapLtd.com.