DeWese--Lessons for the Second Millennium

Well anyway, Vladimir's envoys returned to say that Judaism was no good because there were too many rules. Islam wouldn't work either because there was no drinking allowed. Vladimir damnsure wasn't giving up his Absolut.

Finally, Vladimir learned that the Pope had called him a lyin', cheatin' sot. So Vladimir invented his own religion and named it Russian Orthodox. He proceeded to sell the religion to his people, enabling him to wet his greedy beak freely in the congregations' tithe offerings.