DeWese--Try Hypnosis - Sell Like Magic!

This column is way out on the edge. It falls in the category of "experimental prose." It has not been approved for general use by any government agencies.

As a matter of fact, if you are . . .

1. pregnant;

2. suffering from high blood pressure;

3. wearing mittens to prevent thumb sucking;

4. wearing mittens to prevent scratching your eyes out; or