Dickeson--Don't Be Stupid About Paper

Did I say "by the foot?" That peculiar unit of linearity is a third of a "yard." The "yard" is the distance from the end of some ancient king's nose to the tip of a finger on one of his extended arms. (It all makes a lot of sense if you enjoy working the daily crossword puzzle!) When the Flat Earth Party dominates the Congress, we'll change all that, won't we? If it is indeed the paper, stupid, then why don't we keep it simple, stupid?