Mechanical Binding — Bound for Success

By Erik Cagle

Senior Editor

In one of many hilarious episodes from the long-running animated hit television series, "The Simpsons," bartender Moe Szyslak is hammering a crayon up Homer Simpson's nose to restore his less-than-Hawkingesque intelligence level to subpar standards. Don't ask why.

During the hammering, viewers can witness Homer's digressing intelligence as the crayon is pushed deeper into his brain. At one point during the hammering, Homer mindlessly blathers, "de-fense, de-fense," but the deeper, more acceptable (and thus dumber) level Moe reaches with the crayon (it's called a "Crayola Oblongata") causes Homer to utter, "Extended warranty? How can I lose?"