Some Holiday Gift Giving —DeWese

The next gift goes to Lance O'Brien at Manhattan SuperLithoGrafix in New York. Lance, people find you to be arrogant, self-centered, pretentious and generally phony—wait it's more than just phony. People think you are flat out obnoxious!

Lance, being obnoxious is a huge deterrent to selling. So, your gift is an all-expense paid Internet trip to www.DrPhil.com. Dr. Phil employs 12 psychiatrists around the clock. This is true. You ask a question, the expert gives you an answer, er, for a price. In your case Lance, the price was $22.00. That's right. They are able to hear your problem and instantly estimate the cost for a cure.